I think I found the following article on Yahoo.com on July 2, 2012,
who attributed it to YourTango.com,
who attributed it to Judy Wright Helm[sic] and
dated it Jun 7, 2012.
By Judy Helm Wright
Find out how dads can be firm while bonding with their kids. Many fathers assume discipline means yelling, threatening or spanking children when their behavior is unacceptable. However, discipline can be interpreted in many ways and dealt with differently among different fathers.
The first thing to know about discipline is the two ways it can be interpreted. Some men may be confusing discipline - which means loving guidance and teaching - with punishment. Punishment is punitive and harsh.
Their own fathers worked long hours and the mother did most of the parenting, sometimes with threats such as, "just wait till your father comes home!" Consequently, some men grew up without a strong, caring father. Those men may not be sure how to parent or how to get cooperation without punishing or yelling.
If there is a blended family, or the children are in two households, it is very important for dads to be consistent in giving kind, firm guidance and discipline. Be consistent. If one parent is permissive and the other is punitive or strict, the combined methods constitute a mixed approach. For a child, this is like living in a country where two different governments are operating simultaneously.
Children figure out quickly that the rules are different between two parents, and they learn to play one against the other. This mixed, or inconsistent, approach brings out the most extreme reactions in parents and children. So, as a dad, make a decision that your method of parenting will be consistent and respectful. Once your child knows what your expectations are, he or she will more easily rise to meet those guidelines and trust you.
With that being said, building a trusting relationship with a child is key to proper discipline. Here are five tips fathers can use to discipline a child, while also building a strong father-child bond:
Once a child gets older, reduction of privileges is more effective.
Anger can make almost anyone exaggerate. I found when I was angry, the best thing was to call a time out for both of us, during which both sides should consider the validity of their position. This was often followed by a reasoned, if edgy, discussion of the differences, and sometimes at least partial apologies from both sides. It is important that you demonstrate for your children the proper way to handle being wrong.
Last updated 2 July 2012. Still needs work. Differing opinions are welcomed.